Thursday, October 21, 2010

2nd grade

I spent part of this afternoon sorting through Spring8's papers and such from last school year. It's a lot of work but fun to see how far he's progressed in school. I have to do this when he's out of the house or he insists that we save every scrap of paper. I always end up throwing away a garbage bag full of spelling and math tests. (Unfortunately, recycling isn't an option as it's highly likely I'll get caught disposing of these important papers.) I love to keep the silly doodles, drawings and writing folders. Writing journals are comedy gold and for his 2nd grade teacher a look into our family. (Always be nice to your child's teacher. They know all your secrets.)

Here's an excerpt from one writing journal. The topic being "two things you would never see your mom or dad do."
I would never see my mom clime up the roof because she is scared of hightes. [not scared of "hightes" but nevertheless uninterested in climbing a roof] I would never see my mom go to woeark because she has to wach the babys. [er, well, sort of true, sort of not true] I would never see my dad wawck on a hiwyer because he is scared of hightes. [this is true, for sure] I would never see my dad wash the dishes because he is bad at it. [WHAT?! Not sure what kind of education is going on when I'm not around.]

Oh, and the above picture...he made it for a school art fundraiser. I love it so much I had it put on a mug. When I first saw it, I thought, "It's an elephant pooping from it's nose!" I was wrong because clearly it's a mother elephant teaching her baby elephant to carry and then drop logs with their trunks. When I picked up items we purchased, I mentioned to the mom in charge what I thought. She looked at me seriously for a second (great, did I piss off a PTA mom, but no) and then burst out laughing. She said, "I'm so glad you said that because half of the 2nd grade made the same drawing and they all look like pooping elephants!" Of course, big brother Summer11 had to open his big yap and tell Spring8 what I thought. Spring8 was understandably offended and I think he's still mad at me.

Not too offended because he wrote the following "mother acrostic." [pretty sure we didn't learn words like that in 2nd grade]
My Mom makes me happy.
Openes my haret.
Tuces me in at night.
Hugs me befor I go out to the bus.
Everyday she makes me brefiss.
Reades me a book.

Even with all the times I'm in trouble with Spring8, he'll probably be my last son to move out!

Friday, October 8, 2010

Advice for today

When a curious three year old is finally tall enough to push buttons on the blender, it's unwise to plug in the appliance before putting on the lid.

Bleh, while making a protein shake for Mike, I did just that and Fall3 did just what you'd expect and now I have milk and chocolate protein gunk everywhere. I immediately pushed Fall3 out of the shower of milk and turned off the blender. Fall3 immediately dropped to his knees and pretended to be a dog. It seems to be his go-to solution. How mad could anyone get at a cute puppy?

Monday, October 4, 2010

Only a Small Fire...

It was only a small oven fire but it produced a hell of a lot of smoke. Back up to Sunday morning and homemade caramel rolls which dripped butter and sugar onto a drip pan. A drip pan which should have been removed before it CAUGHT FIRE. I'm not one to have an immaculate oven. There's always some piece of shredded cheese or pizza crust which produces a little smoke or funky smell. The difference between "a little smoke/funky smell" and "billows of smoke/acrid smell" must lie in the height of the flames because on Sunday evening my oven had billows of smoke, acrid smell and HUGE flames originating from that drip full of caramelly goodness.

The four seasons played in the basement as I waited for the flames to extinguish themselves and opened windows and doors. As the smoke smell permeated the house, the boys came upstairs thinking it was time for dinner. That's embarrassing. I don't usually serve charred food yet they smell burning and think it's time to eat.

Upon seeing all the smoke, Spring8, with all his subtlety, shouted, "Smoke! Lots of smoke...we need to crawl!!" Little brothers do as they're told and soon I have three boys crawling through the house...not attempting to leave, just crawling. Fall3 has no idea what's going on so he's crawling behind the other two pretending to be a dog. Next time he sees smoke, he just might start barking.

Summer11 runs though the house dramatically coughing ("because of all the smoke!") while complaining about being cold ("because the windows and doors are open!").

Fortunately, (unfortunately, if you're a potato lover), the worst damage was a ruined cookie sheet and ruined fries. Summer11 insisted that surely the smiley face fries were still fine to eat. I gave him one, he almost gagged, spit it out and went back to his dramatic coughing.

So much for a simple Sunday night dinner.

Thursday, September 30, 2010

A Mama Yeti

My boys and husband are generally tolerant when I attempt to make our house look like something other than a man cave. I was teased when I bought sticks and rocks as part of a decoration ("those are FREE outside!") but they probably don't even notice much else. I'm in constant battle with shoes in the hallway, socks stuffed under couches, underwear on the floor and snacks everywhere.

I also try to make myself appear less manly than the rest of the house. (I don't own a tiara but haven't ruled out one for daily wear.) Stay at home moms don't usually get to be very fashionable but sometimes something cool catches my eye. Such was the case when Mike and I recently strolled through Macy's. I saw an awesome fake fur vest. I stopped and said just that, "Hey! This is an awesome fake fur vest!" Mike, who usually just agrees with any clothes I like (I think all jeans look like jeans to him and all sweaters look like sweaters) burst out laughing. "Yeah, if you want to look like a Yeti!" Before I could even look at the price and before he could stop laughing, my darling husband was making Wookiee sounds (I didn't know it was spelled like that either!). I then realized that there was no awesome fake fur vest in my future. Sure, I could buy it and wear it but I'd have to listen to Wookiee roars from all five boys in my house. Winter4 would want to wear it for Halloween. Fall3 would pet it and get it all sticky. Spring8 would see it hanging up and think it was a werewolf. Summer11 would tell everyone, "My mom bought a shirt that makes her look like Chewbacca!"

No good could come out of it. Besides, for the price I could probably buy another set of stones and sticks for decorations.

Monday, September 27, 2010

Perhaps not his best idea

Mike taught Spring8 one of the truths of life that's passed down from father to son, "With duct tape, all things are possible." It's been well established that Spring8 comes up with some fantastic ideas. Often these ideas aren't able to be executed the way he imagines (even with duct tape!) and he gets very frustrated. Successes include duct taping a flashlight to a remote controlled truck so it can be played with at night. Failures include attempting to create a pulley system so that he and Summer11 could pass things up and down between their bunk beds. After that particular failure, he yelled and stomped out of his room. I found a huge tangle of duct tape, string and a couple of shoe boxes. No wonder he was frustrated. He probably got wrapped up in that mess at some point.

Recently, Spring8 came up with the fantastic idea of making stilts. I know, I know...STILTS? My parents were visiting and I'm fairly certain my father imagined a body cast in the near future. I worry, but not that much, so I imagined only an arm cast. As you can see in the picture, the stilts had a couple of fatal flaws. First, cardboard curtain rod boxes may look like stilts but they aren't all that strong. The bigger problem was the difference in length. After one try, Spring8 decided to add more duct tape because surely that would solve these problems. The stilts worked well enough to get a test run around our family room. He held on to me and we walked (lurchingly) in a circle and laughed. Well, I laughed; he was frustrated because the stilts didn't enable him to walk like someone in the circus.

I couldn't be happier that Spring8 has the imagination and determination to attempt all these crazy ideas. Most new things started out as crazy ideas (perhaps involving less duct tape.)

Sunday, August 22, 2010

Watch Your Toes!

Apparently, I seem like the kind of mom who will suck you up with a vacuum cleaner, either on purpose (followed by a maniacal laugh) or because I'm just cluelessly going about my day. Winter4 isn't afraid of the vacuum but he is concerned that he might become a victim of it.

I happened to vacuum near his "snuggly blanket" one day and he approached me. I say approached because he didn't come too close. He stood about three feet away and yelled, "WATCH OUT FOR MY SNUGGLY BLANKET!! DON'T SUCK IT UP!" Keep in mind that this is a rather large blanket, far larger than the vacuum bag, and it would kill my vacuum. Also, admittedly I have sucked up some small items and not felt too bad about it, but I would never, ever, ever destroy one of his MVP's (most valuable possessions).

While vacuuming in the family room, Winter4 again approached me. "I'M RIGHT HERE! DON'T VACUUM ME UP!" Obviously, I didn't seem worried enough (clueless) or I look like I have evil intent (maniacal laugh) because he again approached me, carefully, getting a bit closer this time. "DON'T SUCK ME UP! I'M YOUR BOY! IF YOU SUCK ME UP YOU WON'T HAVE A BOY!"

What doesn't occur to him is that if he left me alone or cleaned up his things he wouldn't have to worry. He also doesn't seem to realize that I'll still have three boys which on some days is plenty enough. Maybe he should watch his back!